Dancing With The Stars... Really?

So, Dancing With The Stars announced its new cast for its 11th season on Monday night. My first response- where are the stars?

First, Bristol Palin. Really, ABC? Really? Sure, she has a politically-enhanced mom. And yeah, she was preggers during her mom's stint as John McCain's running-mate. Call me crazy, but that makes her less famous than K-Fed.

Next up: Audrina Patridge. The MTV star did make a cameo in one of the network's most popular shows, "The Hills," but she truly owes her success to two people – Lauren Conrad and Justin Bobby. And honestly, if she doesn't get voted off the first week her weight will drop to a single digit.

Mrs. Brady, I mean Florence Henderson, will one-up Marcia in this contest. The dance moves she'll perform may be too risque for the typical, moral-driver mother.

Jennifer Grey is the contestant under the most pressure. The Dirty Dancing star will be expected to tango and waltz the way she did in the 1987 with Patrick Swayze. Either way, Baby will be favored to win.

Shout out to Iowan Kurt Warner. Good luck, QB. Not sure how your touchdowns will score with the judges in this game.

And my personal favorite, who will receive all my votes: Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino. This MTV star has created his own vocab which has taken young adults by storm. To mention a few: grenade, GTL, and a hippopotamus. I'm sure his "situation" will help him out in this competition. And I can't wait to see what dance moves he creates. If they're anything near as good as his Jersey Shore lingo, he'll be flirting his way to the finale.
-Josie Jones and Jennifer Downing