Friday, June 20, 2008


I'm a little geographically challenged when it comes to Iowa since I recently moved here. Even though I familiarized a few crucial locations (my apartment, friends' houses, Coralville mall, Jimmy John's for after-hours pickle binges, etc...), for the life of me, I couldn't figure out where the damn floods were breaching. I idiotically assumed that all my top places to go were safe and sound. So you can imagine how completely and utterly devastated I was when I eventually ventured out to the only grocery store I can afford right now: ALDI.

My main source of sustenance is now surrounded by a large puddle. I should have known!

As I was forced to turn away, sobbing, I noticed that the Waterfront Hy-Vee and their damn 5-dollar generic mayonnaises remained unscathed by the waters except for a minute portion of their matching gas station. And I don't even like mayonnaise! I don't like anything from a grocery store that costs more than $2 or is not a b.o.g.o. Or not a bonus buy. Or not on sale. Unless it's some great, Italian Parmesan or something. Whatever, I'm done complaining. I miss you, Aldi.


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